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Tuesday, September 3, 2013

3 Reasons Codependents Try to Fix Their Difficult Loved Ones' Problems

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Christian Codependency: Three Reasons Codependents Try to Fix Their Difficult Loved Ones' Problems - By Karla Downing 

 If you are struggling with Christian codependency, you likely try to fix your difficult loved ones' problems. Here are three reasons codependents fix people: 




You feel responsible for other people and as a result do things they should be doing for themselves. You feel responsible for other people's emotions, reactions, thoughts, and choices. You are only responsible for caring for them which includes taking care of their responsibilities and obligations, speaking the truth to them, and doing loving things that are healthy. If you don't clear up your misguided sense of responsibility, you will continue to feel that you should fix. God allows us each to be responsible for ourselves, suffer the consequences of our choices, and to be accountable to Him for them. 

You aren't willing to allow other people to suffer. When you see them in pain, you jump in and fix the problems so they won't experience the consequences of their choices. All of us face difficulties in life that God uses to help us to mature and teach us the lessons He wants us to learn. See the struggles they are facing as necessary and good. People have to own their failures in order to own their successes; people need to learn how to triumph in their struggles so they will grow. Give the people in your life the gift of allowing them to face life. 

You can't handle your own emotions. When you feel fear, guilt, anxiety, discomfort, worry, or panic, you will attempt to do something to fix the problem to get rid of your uncomfortable feelings. The only way to not fix is to increase your ability to deal with all your emotions that arise in your relationship. If you don't recognize that this inability to face your own emotions is compelling you to fix other people's feelings, circumstances, and pain then you will continue to do it. Instead, you have to develop ways to cope with your own discomfort other than stepping in. God says to turn all your concerns over to him and He will give you peace (Philippians 4:6-7). Learn to let go and let God and detach from your emotions. 


If you need more practical tips and Biblical truths to help you change your relationships, get my FREE "15-Day Relationship Challenge" designed to give you back the power over your life. Just click here: http://www.free15daychallenge.com Karla Downing is an author, speaker, and licensed marriage and family therapist. Karla's passion is to help people in the midst of their difficult relationships through Biblical truths and practical tools. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Karla_Downing


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3 comments :

  1. Teach me Father God how to deal with my emotions instead of always running and hiding from them, and for always trying to fix other peoples problems when half the time I cant fix my own. Teach me to depend on you for ALL things, not just some things Father God.

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