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Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Why Love is More Important than Sex

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Why Love is More Important than Sex   by Schalk Lubbe

Many men tend to think that sex = love. And Hollywood does its best to spread the word that this is in fact the case. Nothing could be further from the truth, however. Sex is NOT equal to love.

Love is the Foundation of Marriage

Is sex then not part of a loving relationship? It absolutely is.But sex is the result of love, and is not love in and of itself.

Furthermore, while sex can be used as a method to show your wife that you love her, it is by no stretch of the imagination the only - or even the most important - way to demonstrate your love.

Love, on the other hand, is the foundation of marriage. It is possible for a marriage without sex to survive, but a marriage without love will falter and die.

Why is that the case?

Simply because love is what God has based marriage upon.

Love is the total and selfless giving of yourself to, and for the benefit of, the other person. Love asks not but gives. It is not selfish at all. Love is an emotional matter.

Women are emotional

Women have been designed by God to be much more emotional than men. It is not a weakness in their design, but part of God's perfect plan. Accept that fact and adjust yourself to it.

I want to go even further - Do not only accept your wife's more emotional nature, but embrace it. Realise that it is a part of what makes her different to you, and also a part of what makes her special. Appreciate her emotionality rather than criticising it.

It is also because she is more emotional that she attaches much more importance to things (like love) that touch her emotionally.

The Really Important Things:

So if sex is not the most important way to demonstrate your love for your wife, then what is?

Here is a list of a few things that are of great(er) importance:

❤ ❥ You should tell her regularly that you love her

❤ ❥ But more importantly, show her daily that you love her (see below for more detail)

❤ ❥ Be truly interested in her

❤ ❥ You should listen intently when she speaks

❤ ❥ Show your support for everything she does

❤ ❥ Always be kind to her

❤ ❥ Always be gentle with her - especially when she is emotional

❤ ❥ Always be patient with her - especially when it is difficult

❤ ❥ Always be faithful to her and to your marriage.

How to SHOW her that you love her?

❤ ❥ Help her with the chores in the house

❤ ❥ Offer to cook dinner when she is ill

❤ ❥ Romance her the way you used to when you still dated her

❤ ❥ Attend to little things, like bringing her flowers as a surprise - for no reason other than because you love her!

❤ ❥ This list is by no means an exhaustive list of ALL the things you should do. Rather consider it a list of guidelinesabout the areas of life that you should be concentrating on.

The golden rule - learn to know your wife. Know what she likes and what she dislikes. And strive to give her more of what she likes and less of what she dislikes.


When you love your wife with your whole being and show it by living according to what she likes you will be her hero. She will adore you with all her heart. And then she will gladly also be your sex partner.

If you are serious about your marriage, I would like to invite you to join me in further discovering the detailed things that your wife wants from you to be a good husband by reading my eBook in which are to be found many more tips on how to be the type of husband your wife wants.Go to http://www.GoodHusbandSecrets.com to get your own copy of this amazing eBook and start applying its tips today.Thanks for reading, and may I wish you a long, happy marriage - Schalk Lubbe Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Schalk_Lubbe Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/4738037

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  1. sex is just a word to survive but love is to deeper your lasting relationship ,,,,,

  2. The only thing I disagree with here is the part about God creating women to be more emotional than men. That is simply not true...on the inside, when it comes to matters of the heart and human reasoning, God created us all the same. That men are by nature less emotional than women is a lie that has been spread through time; a myth created by individuals who wanted an excuse for their lack of consideration for their partner's feelings: "God made me this way...I'm just not as emotional as a woman".
    What's more is that society teaches males from as early as the toddler stage to suppress their emotions ("boys don't cry...it shows weakness when they do") By the time these toddlers become men, they have had a lifetime of practice on suppressing their emotions: it's what they've been taught, so it's what they do.
    Females, on the other hand, have always been taught that it is okay to cry, express your feelings and be emotional, because it's "what women are like by nature". Had it been the other way around; if women had been taught to suppress their emotions and men had been taught to express theirs, wouldn't we be hearing today that by nature, women are not as emotional as men? On the inside, and when it comes to feelings and emotions, we were all created equally by God. Both men and women can choose to show emotion, and that was the way God intended for it to be.

    1. Cultural conditioning does shape our emotional expression and experience. But people do differ in their levels of emotionality because of their hormonal balance. Women, for instance, who take testosterone injections suddenly 'feel' like men feel, wanting suddenly to express aggression and 'bang anything that moves.' Men injected with oxytocin suddenly find themselves crying over tv shows that previously had no emotional impact on them! I know women who are quite rational and have a fairly even keeled and non reactive (emotionally) and men who are clearly histrionic! But I believe that in general women are more emotional because they have more Estrogen and Oxytocin and men have higher T. It's why your grandpa started crying more later in his life (actually mine never 'broke' away from his anger) because his T. levels dropped off.