Equal Rights?

Equal Rights? -  Lisa U Maki

What you sow you reap is a principle that I have always expected from my marriage. I have always believed that if I do something to my husband, then I will reap the same. This surely brought a lot of frustrations on me because there were so many times when I expected my husband to return what I did for him in the same manner, and in the same amount, but he didn't. 
I used to not understand why he can't be patient with me in as much as I exercise patience on him; why he can't prioritize me the way I prioritize him. I mean, come on, I can stop everything for him. I can be talking on the phone and when it's time for me to cook for him, serve him, or be with him, I will stop my conversation. But in so many occasions, he never did the same for me. He can be talking for hours on the phone without even thinking that I cooked dinner for him and it has been sitting for a while. There were so many times too when I kept awake for him, no matter how sleepy I was, just to keep him company. But during those nights when I couldn't sleep, not only didn't he want to keep awake; he even blamed me for not falling asleep. Now can you relate with what I am saying?
It can be very frustrating, right? There were times when I decided to take matters into my own hands and withheld some sweetness from him. Yet, the conviction inside me was so great. Several times I heard God say, "Continue to love him, regardless". And many times too I ignored it. As if God let me get away with it. He surely dealt with me on those instances.
What I have learned and continue to learn is that God's instructions for wives have no conditions. God did not call us to submit to our husbands only if they are showing us some love. He did not tell us to respect them only when they are being nice. He did not command us to admire them just when they are admirable. It has never been and will never be an "I will give you this but you have to give me this" mindset. It is all about giving. It is all about dying to the self. It is all about picking up our cross and following Jesus. It is all about humility.
But wait! What about my rights? I deserve to be treated nicely. I deserve some help in the kitchen. I deserve this... I deserve that.
God knows for sure what you rightfully deserve. Trust that He will give it to you. Meanwhile, do your part in giving what God expects you to give to your husband. Don't take matters into your own hands because you won't do a great job. Why not let God do His job?
You will be surprised how God is going to work in your husband. You will be amazed at how your husband will all of a sudden see things that he never saw before. You will be astounded at how your husband will start being more sensitive to your needs.
Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you (Luke 6:38).
There is something here though that you have to understand. The "giving" comes first. This kind of giving does not expect something in return. The kind of giving that expects to receive is not the kind of giving that will be blessed in full measure.
Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete (John 16:24).
Take a closer look at this Scripture above... "until now you have not asked anything". This is the kind of attitude that God will reward. When God sees that your heart is all about giving, and when he sees that you have the spirit of servitude, then He will tell you to ask Him what you want, and He will give it to you.
I for myself want to give my husband more back rubs when he is not even asking for it. There were times when I saw him rubbing his own back and I immediately offered and gave him a full massage. I've also noticed that when I don't ask him to buy me anything, he offers to take me shopping. I believe there is something about the spirit of giving... the kind that does not expect anything in return, that make the other person want to give you more.
This is the secret that God wants to share with us. This is the mystery that He is revealing to us in our marriage. He wants to humble us so He can operate more freely in our lives. He wants us to be selfless so He can take over. He wants us to give everything so He can give us more.
Why not start now? Give to your husband more than you've ever given. Give without expecting to receive. Give because you love him. Give because you love God.
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