Getting Real In Relationships - Really Real

Getting Real In Relationships - Really Real -  Steve Wickham

Relationships are effort, pure and simple. But, there are rich rewards for the effort. I was reminded of this recently when I received an article from an online journal I subscribe to. Immediately I read this truth from James Adonis I knew I wanted to comment on it. It just rang true. Admittedly it was 'work-related' but what he says applies to, and provokes thought regarding, all communication. Here it is:
"To put communication in context, let's examine a typical relationship. A man can say "I love you" to his wife but the words alone are meaningless unless they're accompanied by care and compassion, thoughtful surprises, hand-written cards, faith, support, romantic dinners, and many other actions which convey far more than "I love you" that he really does love her."
"So what are the lessons for us at work? There are five:

  • What you do communicates much more than what you say.

  • The most important skill - by far - that a manager possesses is communication.
  • Email isn't communication - it's just spam.
  • Information isn't communication - it's just data.
  • Speaking isn't even communication - it's just making noises with your mouth.

  • Listening is the most powerful method of communication we can use."[1]
    So, there you have it. Did you test yourself? How did you go? Challenging isn't it?
    Listening is the golden rule; two ears, one mouth. We learn nothing if we don't listen. If we learn nothing we have nothing to teach. You might not be a 'manager' at a workplace, but I would suggest you do have relationships that require 'management' in your life.
    Want to be a better communicator? Work hard on your listening skills. Improvement 'won't happen overnight,' as the shampoo advert would say, 'but it will happen.'
    If you want a real and effective relationship with someone whether that is your partner or a work colleague, as Stephen Covey said, "Seek first to understand, then be understood."
    The problem with communication is the illusion that it has been accomplished.
    -George Bernard Shaw

    Copyright © 2008, Steven John Wickham. All Rights Reserved Worldwide. Steve Wickham is a safety and health professional (BSc) and a qualified lay Christian minister (GradDipDiv). His passion in vocation is facilitation and coaching; encouraging people to soar to a higher value of their potential. Steve's interest in psychology is matched by years of experience in the psychology of safety in workplaces. Steve's key passion is work / life balance and re-creating value for living, and an exploration of the person within us. Article Source:  Article Source:

    Find us on Facebook: